Why Is This Happening For Me?

UnknownThe Most Full Of Wonder Reverend Dr. EDGARD FRANCISCO DANIELSEN-MORALES,
gave a Sermon some time ago at MCC New York www.mccny.org
in which he talked of the importance of learning how to
Stop asking,
“Why is this happening to me?”
and Begin asking,
“Why is this happening for me?”

It’s a Great Question.

I don’t imagine it is always answered in ways we can comprehend.
And it is certainly not answered on our schedule.
How does the saying go? “In GOD’s time Not in Ours”
In the case of my Illness, now with a few years distance, I can see it quite clearly.
It brought home to me the awareness that I was living my life,
leaving nothing behind, at least that I could see.
It made me aware of the need to say “YES!” way more in my Life.IMG_4127
‘We all have two lives.
The second one starts when we realize that we have only one.’
And so I began Writing.
Is it great Writing?
Is it destined to be the most memorable Writing of a Generation?
All of that is not for me to know.
But it is now.
It exists
It is here
Where there never was a Hat.
And that’s Good Enough.

IMG_2987During the AIDS Crisis
I could not see any Meaningful Answer
Nor a Reason.
Very Little of it made sense.
Eventually, I saw our Community Come together
And I am So Proud to have been a Part of that Moment in History when we Found ourselves
our Voice

And to have lived through all that it has led to
And Today, Half a Lifetime Later,
I discover so many people ill-equipped to handle someone dying
Frightened because of its lack of familiarity
Afraid of Hospitals
Or Just mired in Fear
Nothing will prepare you to help Someone who is Dying
Or to Deal with Someone who is Ill
Like Losing Someone Close to You every two weeks when you’re 22 years old.

Sometimes the Question is easy to answer
And it doesn’t take a long time to figure out.
I went to BERGORF GOODMAN’s After Christmas Sale because I had my eye on an ornament I’d found there for a friend.
I waited until they dropped from 40% off to 70% off.
By that time, the ornament I’d hoped to nab was completely gone.
‘Why is this Happening for Me?
Then I came upon a way Better Ornament, which at 70% off was do-able.
Two of ‘em!BGH7HWG_mx
I like it when the answer comes like that.
Nice and Pat.
That is not, of course, the way it usually happens
At least in my Experience.
There are so many times the Question seems to go unanswered.
I imagine that those of us who ask it a lot do not find an answer most of the time.
Perhaps it is staring us right in the face.
Perhaps it is something we learn later.
Perhaps it is not ours to know.

Well, that’s where that TRUST thing comes into play.
And like so many Life Lessons, it appears that
it has more to do with Asking the Question than Receiving the Answer.
It is about the Journey, not the Destination.
As RILKE put it, “Live the Questions Now…”
Whether I can figure it out or not in any given situation is not Always the point,
Asking the Question is a Constant Affirmation that
I KNOW Life is for Me.

And So it is.

Go Ahead.
Ask it.
I dare you…
Why is this happening for Me?


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1 Comment

  1. Darcie

     /  February 3, 2015

    Brother Arnold bringing the word of God/Love! This really ministered to me today.


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